Crescent City Sucks

even on a good day...

Friday, June 17, 2005

My Tsunami Fantasy

1. I REALLY wish a huge wave would have hit Crescent City. In my tsunami fantasy, only the evil would be killed and all the ugly buildings on the waterfront(and stupid "resort" hotels built on my birthplace) would be destroyed.

2. All of my talented but as of yet unrecognized friends would get their fifteen minutes of fame from the news coverage immediately following the "disaster".

3. Crescent City's non-existent local economy would be revitalized by federal disaster relief funds.

4. After much deliberation on how to best help the locals, State officals would tear down Pelican Bay State Prison and replace it with a CSU-system four-year college. Prisoners would be used to build the new school and then would be given free education(if eligible). Far-fetched but fun anyway.

5. All of the local crack-heads would rush to the beach to watch the wave and would be washed away with the rest of the trash.

7 Comments:

At 6/17/2005 10:36:00 PM, Anonymous seattleite said...

Hey,How come when I move away exciting stuff finally starts happening in my wonderful hometown of CC? Whe I heard about the quake and possible "disaster" i was a little worried at first. I turned on the news to see if I could find out if there was any damage to CC, but like Michael I heard nothing about that. They didn't even address it, by saying "there was no damage reported and everyone is safe" Our mainstream media finds it much more importnat to show pics of people running around like idiots all for no reason. Hey, now that's a story. Just like Natalie Halloway lost, (I mean sadly to say most likely murdered) in Aruba should be the top story along with who Tom Cruise is banging this week!!! Ahhhh, it makes me sad to be an American and a journalist. Maybe I can make a difference.

 
At 6/18/2005 01:36:00 AM, Blogger Darius said...

I slept through the earthquake, but when I heard about it I have to admit I pictured a huge, delicious wave destroying the town. It would have been pretty cool.

 
At 6/18/2005 05:13:00 AM, Anonymous michael said...

I publish this blog because belittling and hurting other people makes me feel better.

 
At 6/19/2005 09:33:00 AM, Blogger Rori said...

Blogs are a great outlet for whatever ails you.

Keep it UP

 
At 6/20/2005 02:07:00 AM, Anonymous haley said...

Michael,
I am unimpressed by your blog, as well as your friendship. Ok, I hadn't checked your blog for a while, and now after I read some of it I remembered why I hadn't been back to check it out. Kinda boring, lots of complaing involved. I sometimes enjoy being a bitch and talking shit, so I can't blame ya. Some fool actually hit my aunt at a stop sign due to the frenzy. This guy apparently didn't think stop sign laws were in effect during evacuations. My aunt is ok, but her car is fucked. That town you are in is crazy.

 
At 6/20/2005 01:44:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

you are all not ready for the end of the world, if you were then you would have killed yourselves already.

 
At 6/20/2005 05:35:00 PM, Blogger Ed said...

I heart tsumani! In 1986, there was a tsunami warning in CC after an (I think) Alaska earthquake, similar to the 1964 e-quake that caused the last wave that hit our little town. All the lower downtown blocks were evacuated, but no one crashed their cars or freaked out. I think we are collectively more like scared sheep now, ready to panic at every new 'disaster'. I heart paranoid citizenry!

 

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