Crescent City Sucks

even on a good day...

Friday, May 06, 2005

I'm a moody bitch

I didn’t think I was going to make it today. The linoleum-covered concrete floors hurt my feet and my co-worker insisted on smoking indoors, filling air already thick with human smells with acrid cigarette smoke. A light but steady mist billowed on the streets outside, evidenced by damp currency and dripping wet customers. I usually like the rain, water purified by evaporation and condensation that falls on my town and cleans the dark gray pavement stained by desperation. But tonight the sweaty mist roiled in air and empty streets. No stories about lunatics : tonight I’m the lunatic. Maddened by my existence in this town, my hometown. My attempts to romanticize it bares it’s teeth and reveals it’s true character. This place never opened itself to me, never took me in and accepted me for who I was when I was younger or who I’ve become. I had to leave to be accepted, only far from home could I discover my true self. I consider myself a failure in this town. I can’t take myself seriously in this place. I’ve got get out of here.

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